Play time!

http://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=plcp&v=gZGLWtH5Jbk

While Daddy is Gone

The girls will play!

Mike was gone this week in St. Louis for training for work. The girls and I had a fantastic week! Rosalie got to finger paint for the first time and made a gift for grandma and grandpa. She had so much fun! She did eat some, thankfully it's non toxic. She will be getting some fun crafty/drawing stuff for Christmas.

Gabby has been congested all week but is still such a sweet girl. I swear I feel like there was a major turn around in her demeanor within the last few weeks! She's been so smiley and happy and has actually let people hold her!!

We took a trip to Indianapolis on Wednesday. I needed to get my Black Friday purchases from Amy's house. I had planned to go Thursday but then she mentioned Bryce had his Christmas show Wednesday so we decided to go then. Sean was in it at the same time so it worked out perfectly! Jon was off, Amy's parents and brother came. Staci's sisters and brother, mom and nephew were there as well as Kyle (Sean's dad....whom I don't like. At. All. ) and his new wife was there as well. It was so awesome getting to be there for that. It's nice being close enough to be there! Rosalie had a blast playing with stacis sisters, Amy's mom (meme), and aunt staci. Amy's dad (pa) held gabby for quite awhile making me baby free! I felt so naked, I didn't know what to do! The boys were adorable as always and did great in the show.

Friday was the house inspection which went pretty well. There's only a couple of relatively concerning things. The electrical to the garage needs redone, something we will definitely ask the seller to do. Also on of the bedrooms has no heat source so we need to think about what to do there. We think it legally can only be called a 2br because of that but need to look into it more. Also, thanks aunt sissy for hanging out with Rosalie yesterday!

This view

I love this view. Makes me proud to be their mommy.

.....and now I smell a stinky. Not so proud.

Doctor, doctor!

Since we moved we've had to establish a new pediatrician for the girls. We were assigned to a middle-aged Indian woman. So far she seems okay.

Gabby saw her last week before Thanksgiving and was supposed to get shots but I didn't feel comfortable doing that before holiday travel. (Mike agrees with my medical decisions for the most part because I research everything). Well, she was supposed to get 5 vaccines today. I've been reading a lot for the last week or two about alternate/selective vaccination and decided which shots to give, which to refuse and which to delay. I wish I had researched more and refused more with Rosalie. Oh well.

So. Gabby got a shot today but that was it. She was 12.5lb and 24.5in last week.

Rosalie was 27lb 12oz but I'm not sure how tall she is. She was such a crab today and needed a nap. She was so whiny! The twos aren't going to be fun!

Home hunting...

Is no fun with small kids. Driving around just looking at the outsides was an experience with them. I can hardly imagine what actually looking at them will be like. We did narrow our list down to about 8 houses we are curious about though. I can't wait to get out of this gypsy lifestyle and have a place to call out own. To decorate. To really live. To grow. To establish traditions in. Play dates and sleepovers. Tea parties and dress up. Flag football and catch. The possibilities are endless. I just hope we can find something that we like and can make our own.

We also really need to find a church home. I'm worried we won't find somewhere that is child friendly. I hate disrupting other people's worship time with fussing babies. Other people's kids don't bother me when they fuss but I have a hard time focusing when it's my own kiddos. I'm hoping to find a church with a nursery but we will see.

4am

Gabby decided she needed a diaper change at 4 this morning. Here are some blurry action shots of our short play time before going back to sleep.

Resentment?

Why is it that I'm the ONLY one that can even think about getting Gabs to sleep. Seriously. It's getting incredibly old. I'm tired of being the only one. Sick of it actually. She screams every night for hours. I get looked at like I'm doing nothing but reality is that nothing works. After hours she finally succumbs.
I don't know if it's her personality, the fact that she's breastfeeding or what but I'm not sure how much more I can handle. I just want to give up and cry. No one can hold her hardly without her freaking out and then I spend even more time trying to calm her down.

I need her out of my bed and to sleep on her own for more than 20min at a time. I'm slowly going nuts.

I think I'm starting to resent mike. He can come and go as he pleases and I can't. He does. I haven't had but a showers worth of time completely to myself since before she was born. She does nothing but cry for him. Ugh.

Nursling

I love this sweet nursling.


I also love her big sissy who loves her sissy.

They light  up my life.

Moving day....again!

Tomorrow is moving day. Boy I can't wait to be done moving. Hopefully when we buy our house we won't have to move for quite awhile. That's the goal when buying a house, right? Never in my life did I think I'd own my own home (well with mike of course). It was just not something that ever crossed my mind. My dad always rented so I figured I would as well. I'm glad were buying. Renting seems like a giant waste of money.

Today is Election Day! We made our vote count, did you?

Stand Up!

Why is it that people can post/say opinions but the moment someone disagrees it creates pandemonium?  I'm fine with agreeing to disagree. I just don't understand how someone saying they disagree with your stance means that you have to get defensive, make red herrings and retract (delete in this case) your statement. If you made a mistake that's one thing but to just completely shut down? I don't get it. STAND UP for what you believe in, even if others disagree. There's nothing wrong with healthy discussion and disagreements. It makes life interesting! No need to be nasty of course. This is for any opinion, not just the topic at hand today.

While on this topic I feel like i need to ask my readers (all three of you?!) how you all feel about public breastfeeding and why. Think long and hard and really think about the why behind it.

Personally, I don't give a rats patootie what you do. Don't hate on (yup, getting "ghetto" here) mothers and how they feed their child. Breastfeeding is NORMAL and HEALTHY. I don't care if you cover, don't cover, feed in your car or elsewhere. Feed where you want. Babies shouldn't be banished to eating their meals in the bathroom. I do think that as mothers, women, wives that we should be discreet but sometimes babies just don't agree! They frequently like to play with covers and throw them off! That doesn't mean you have to cover but if your wearing a tank top, use a burp rag or something to cover some skin. I believe in modesty and i think that breastfeeding can be a beautiful experience and still modest. I frequently breastfeed Gabs without a cover. If it makes you uncomfortable please feel free to look away.

I feel the need to be forthright. Before I was a mom (a nursing mom especially) I thought that covering up was something you should do. I thought "Oh, why does that woman have to breastfeed without a cover, how rude!" I also had no intentions on breastfeeding before I did research and had Rosalie. Rosalie got the wonderful nutrients from mamas milk for all of two weeks before I gave up. Yes, gave up. I blamed (and still do sometimes) it on lack of support, having no idea what I was doing and what was normal, etc. All kinds of excuses. This time around I was determined. It's been hard, no doubt about that. I used to be against breastfeeding past a certain age but now that makes no sense to me and I have no idea when I'll stop. I don't see myself breastfeeding a toddler but who knows!

Gabby's first feed :)

In this article the author points out that sometimes we literally just don't have an extra hand. I hadn't even thought about that. Between keeping track of your diaper bag, using a cover, positioning baby, sometimes holding your breast and possibly trying to hold on to a wandering toddler it just isn't always convenient or easy.

I realize that this is all jumbled up and all over the place. I'm just typing as things come to me.

People (including mike at one point) say "oh, why can't you just pump and give a bottle?" First things first. Women shouldn't HAVE to pump and give a bottle. Now,  not all women are able to pump. I can attest to that. I'm lucky to get like 3oz in half an hour which isn't enough for a single feeding and some women can't even get that! Not to mention the possible expense of a pump. Why pump when boobies are free? Sometimes babies just do NOT take a bottle no matter what you do. Seriously. I know it sounds insane but it's the honest truth. Gabby is one of those babies that it was like pulling teeth (where did that expression come from I wonder) to get her to take a bottle.

I don't consider myself a lactivist. I don't think that formula is poison, nor do I think anyone is a bad mom for not breastfeeding. Do I wish more women would breastfeed? Of course, there's so much good that can from feeding your kids what was made for them and holy moly is it easier!

Daddy Baby Music Time

Evidently Rosalie loves music and loves when daddy plays the guitar. Makes this mama's heart happy.

Life In Indiana

Our time in the active military life has nearly come to an end. Mike gets out officially in mid december. I have to admit it's a little bittersweet. I loved the experiences we had while he served. The people, the places, the fun stuff we got to do and the military culture are all things I'll never regret. The military life is a tough life for anyone and I give mad props that can do it for years on end. I don't do well without Mike by my side and he hated missing out on things with Rosalie and didn't want to continue to miss out. He also didn't like a lot of the bull that goes along with the military.

On that note, we're really excited to be back in Indiana! Mike searched briefly for jobs outside of Indiana and came up empty handed so here we are. Happily, here we are.

 Mike officially accepted a position with Dish Network in Terre Haute. It seems like a great opportunity for him and will bring on some sort of stability. It's obviously much closer to home than anywhere we've been in awhile but still far enough that we'll still be off in our own little world. We've found an apartment that has a short-term lease option and we move in next Wednesday and will begin looking for a house soon. I'm looking forward to purchasing, decorating, and having our own space. Something that is truly ours, not rented or borrowed. I'm even looking forward somewhat to the stress of buying a house! Yep, as whack job as that sounds, I am!

The girls have adjusted really well and are loving all the time they're getting to spend with family. Well, Rosalie is. Gabby hasn't got much of a clue. They're both growing like weeds. Rosalie must be going through a huge growth spurt as she's eating grandma and grandpa out of house and home! Gabby's doing great as well and her reflux seems to be relatively under control. We just need to have her meds adjusted but since Tricare has no Prime providers in the area I'm afraid we're out of luck for the time being and will have to switch to Prime Remote or Standard and see what happens. Annoying but I'm just thankful to have insurance at all! 

Next thing is to find a church we can attend and feel welcomed in. I'm excited to find one and excited to get involved in our community. I want the girls to grow up involved and with lots of activities and fun things to do. 

Our sweet Monkey

Happy Halloween from the Fronckowiaks! (also, our first family picture since Gabs was born)

Someone's gonna be a rocker!

September 7, 2012

As I sit here just over 5 weeks after giving birth to our beautiful Gabrielle Elyse, I realize that I: 1. haven't written a blog in over 6 months and 2) have yet to type out her birth story. What a failure!

With a move on the horizon we were on a time crunch for baby to get here. (little did we know we had more time than we had planned on! Thanks Army!) We went to my 40 week appointment and my midwife checked me and saw that I was progressing. I wanted to have enough time with Gabby before the move to establish breastfeeding, etc and was getting anxious to meet her. The midwife checked me and found that i was 2cm and 50% effaced so my body WAS working just not as quickly as we thought we needed. We scheduled an induction for that Friday, Sept 7.

We were told to call that morning and see what time they could get us in. I called at 6am and they said to call back at 11 because they were doing shift change and were short staffed and weren't sure what time they'd be able to get us in. No big deal, i went back to bed. I slept in a bit since i knew it'd likely be the last time I could before the baby came and I wanted to be rested for labor and didn't sleep well the night before.

When I called at 11 they asked what time I could get there and I told them an hour as I wasn't sure how long it'd take to get there and Mike wanted to grab some lunch. We stopped at Jack in the Box and got me a smoothie, I wanted something light.

When we arrived we were taken to our room and told about the induction process which we already knew about from Rosalie. This time however we were told that if they didn't see change in my cervix or start labor, we'd be going home to try again another day. I was given the first dose of medication and monitored for an hour. I was having a few contractions but nothing unpleasant. After the monitoring we were told to go walk around and come back in a couple hours. I had a few more intense but still not bothersome contractions on our walk. We got some snacks and headed back up to our room in L&D.

I was hooked up to the monitors again and the nurse noted some contractions and wanted to make sure they weren't too close together before giving the next dose of meds. They weren't so I got the dose and stayed on monitors for awhile and ate some lunch before being told to go walk around again. Lunch was a gross grilled cheese and fries but the cheese cake was yummy! This is where things got fun!

Mike and I were walking around and he wanted something to eat so while he was getting food I started to get nauseated so decided to leave the area and go walk and do some squatting through the contractions. They were really starting to hurt! We walked some more and Mike must have noticed a change of some sort because he forced me to go back upstairs before we were supposed to. We got back to our room and I couldn't lay down through contractions and had to be on all fours in the bed. I started feeling some pressure so I asked the nurse to check me. I was 6cm and 100% effaced! All that in just a few hours! The nurse asked if I still wanted a water birth and I said yes so she brought a nurse over from the delivery area to help me get to my new room.

When we got to the delivery room they had just started setting up and I remember hearing one of the nurses say that they needed to get the warmer turned on, the large tub running and the birthing supplies out because I was going FAST! They asked if i wanted in the small tub while the large one was getting ready and i said of course! I was on the birthing ball waiting for them to get the tubs going and that was pure agony but boy did it work to get her to drop down. I remember standing up and looking at my belly and thinking "holy cow she dropped" and mike commented that my belly looked funny.

I got into the small tub and almost immediately started feeling INTENSE pressure and the feeling like I needed to push. The nurse checked me again and said I was 10cm and just had a tiny lip of cervix left! This was all within about 60-70min of being checked the last time! Moving out of the water was agonizing. I had a contraction out of the tub as I was about to get in and apparently my midwife was standing behind me ready to catch! Haha too funny! I got in and she told me to push when i was ready and to use any position I wanted but I couldn't move from where I was, which was just laying/floating there. I started pushing and she came out in just three pushes! Less than 10 min of pushing! That's what happens when you let your body labor down, I guess! She was born in the caul (still in the amniotic sac, apparently my water never broke like we thought it had). Evidently that means good luck. She still had a ton of vernix so the midwife/nurses were thinking my dates were off, which is certainly possible (oh that awesome spinny wheel of due dates!)




Gabrielle Elyse was born at 7:57pm and weighed 8lb 1oz and was 18 3/4in. She weighed the same as I did as a baby which is pretty neat. She nurses like a champ (constantly!) and is getting more and more alert as the days go by.

Horrible Medical Minds

Mike is a proponent of medicine and using the technology we've discovered. It came as quite a shock to me when we were discussing someone in my birth group getting results of her sweet baby having downs and being sick. He was asking how they knew for sure and all that. When I explained how he understood and soon the topic was brought to inductions, c sections, etc.

It's been common knowledge that I think ok many c sections and inductions are unnecessary. He was amazed to learn that the US has one of the highest rates of infant mortality He said he believes that's because of too much medical intervention and women not being allowed to birth "late" as well as those women who want to be induced for comfort, timing, dr schedule, etc. He fully understands (as do I) that things happen, interventions can be necessary and all that jazz. Hes amazing and truly gets that a woman's body was made todo this! We were built for giving birth! It's not necessarily a fun time, pregnancy, but our bodies can do it! Woman have been birthing for thousands of years without the "help" of inductions and the myriad of interventions we have today. He doesn't he why women have to be put on a time limit for birthing and pregnancy, neither do I. Yay for spinny wheels of due dates?

I'm dumb...

Mike is awesome and got me a root beer float. It also set us back about 20 miles from his parents. So worth it!

We came over the crest of a hill and mike says "oh hello mountains". To which my dumb ass says oh you mean those hills. Nope the mountains are in the distance. Wowzers. Seriously that was dumb.

We made it!

We made it to eastern Washington last night and are currently about 3 hours or so from Seattle. So far Washington has has sun, rain, snow and a wintery mix. Reminds me of home in that respect. Otherwise it's cold now and yucky. I think that's typical northwest though.

We are going to look at a few houses tonight and tomorrow though I think we're still hoping to live on post. We're staying with amber and Michael until we find a place. They're gracious enough to open their home to us and we really can't be more thankful for that. I see lots of killer bunnies and quelf in our future.

Winona

Winona is where we stopped for the night. It's a super cute little town. Don't think we'll be moving there. I love the accent up here! So cute!

Headed to the mall of America today. About 1.5hr I believe from Winona. Er follow the river the whole way which freaks me out. For those that don't know I have a huge fear of being trapped in a car underwater. Not a good fear to have, like any are, when you're driving along water.

I sneezed and got sneeze gunk all over mikes car. Win.

I think this place doesn't have...

Meat. I thought it was going to be the end of the world for our meat loving family, especially the males. *ahem* dad. He chose the place. Which made it really funny that it was vegan/vegetarian.

If you're ever in wisconsin stop at exit 92 on i90 and head toward the BP gas station. On your right you'll see a bed and breakfast style building which proclaims that they make home made food. Tey have an excellent grilled cheese sandwhich as well as many other options. The grilled cheese is one of Rachel Ray's top 4 in the country!

Our first gas stop

Stopped for gas and because this momma has a tiny bladder.

Also got some super weird chips that mike says are more sour than hazardously sour candies. Weird

Also, huge windmill farm.

On the road again....

Left Connersville at 9am. Hit up a gas station and weigh station to weigh te car and holy hell that thing his heavy! It's near bottoming out!

Stopped for lunch at steak n shake and I got a Frisco melt. No steak n shakes in Washington that I know of :(

Apparently as co pilot of this while it's my mission to blog every stupid little detail of this trip. Mike had a full sugar red bull so for whatever reason thinks this is a good idea. It'll bore you to tears so I'm sorry in advance.

Sometimes...

I came across an old acquaintance's blog earlier today and it got my head spinning. I can't believe that a woman, a mother at that, would criticize someone's choices so harshly. I think we all have opinions and none of us are innocent of judgement. I think opinions are great and I love that we all have differing views on everything. 

There are very few things that I think are non-negotiables as far as parenting, birth, etc go. Of course, those "non-negotiables" are also my opinions.

Yes, this is one of those posts. 

The basic gist of said acquaintance's post was that she's better than the moms that were in the hospital on her delivery night. She's better because she doesn't moan, growl, scream or apparently vocalize in anyway while she's in labor. This is really uncommon. Most women, even those with epidurals, moan, grunt, etc. As far as I know this can be a beneficial thing, even my doula was speaking of how if you "ahhh" during pushing you're less likely to tear. She criticized a woman for puking. Yes puking, another very common occurrence during transition. Stated "We were like oh there goes another woman that doesn't know what to do. She of course took the wheelchair upstairs." Huh? Apparently, it's also not okay to take a wheelchair anywhere. I didn't realize that puking meant you didn't know what to do...seeing as women in labor puke a lot apparently not many people know what they're doing? That's good to know. 

The blog I'm speaking about makes me really sad. Sad for the mothers she's criticizing especially. Who are we to judge someone because they want an epidural. Yes, you all know that I believe the majority of women can do it without it but that doesn't mean every woman wants to. I think it shows the power and amazement of the woman's body. You want an epidural, drugs, birthing on your back, baby cleaned off before you hold him or her? Go for it, I'm not going to stop it. I KNOW that giving birth without an epidural is hard work. Don't have to convince me! I think she also fails to realize that some people have had very traumatic experiences in their lives and are fearful of giving birth or of pain. Not every situation is as easy as her deliveries seem to be. 

I also realize that I come across very strongly about a lot of my opinions. If i've EVER made you feel badly about a decision, come across this way please let me know. I'm very sorry if i've ever come across this way. (I'll argue with you to the death on some things if I can PROVE it's better..but that doesn't mean it's not your choice still.) 

Figuring it out

The year starts with a boat load of questions. How will we get it all done? Can we handle two kids this close together? Will we be ran ragged at home with no time to just sit and do nothing on our "vacation"? Will we like Washington? How can we be better? Will this pregnancy be as great as the first? Will we be healthy? CAN we become healthier? What kind of gear do we need for the new baby? What will his or her name be? I know these may seem silly but i have questions like this constantly and i have SERIOUS anxiety over most of them. More than anything I want our move to go smoothly and this pregnancy to be healthy.

I ate poorly with Rosalie and gained 40lb. I was lucky to be able to lose it all quickly but my body just isn't the same. YES, i know that it probably won't ever have everything in the spot that it once was but dang, it sucks. I doubt many people see it but me. I'm hoping to not gain as much with this lil bean as I did  with Rose. How can I do that? What should I and shouldn't I be eating? HELP!!! I don't even know where to begin! I don't want a radical change, something I can't stick to. I just need something...better, something easy. I realllly don't enjoy cooking at all...especially if it's "hard" stuff. I can bake and i enjoy it, maybe that's my problem. I desperately need to drink more water. A friend came up with using a timer...each time the timer goes of she has to drink a bottle of water....maybe i'll use that idea. How many ounces though? I drank SO much milk with rosalie i didn't have room for anything else! In fact, that's how Mike knew I was pregnant! I'm sure my mother-in-law thought it was weird that i was drinking milk with my pizza (that's what she drinks with pizza normally and i think it's weird)....pregnancy explains that.

I'm struggling with getting this house in order to get the heck outta here. I'm overwhelmed and don't know where to begin. Perhaps I should start in one room and work my way out....I have stuff to sell but it's SUCH a hassle, I don't want to bother. I'd rather just sit everything outside and tell people to come and get it.

Too many questions, not enough answers. Not enough time. Not enough motivation.